Post pushed trauma

              So.... while we were reading pushed in class I remembered how people reacted to so many things in the book. Some jumped, cringed, shrieked, chuckled, or looked disgusted. I also reacted sometimes as we discussed the book, but I felt I wasn't as affected by what was said in the book as everyone else. As if I was just a bit calmer about the event in the book  than everyone else. Thought.
               Then one day I get a phone call from my mom. We just start catching up, how's school, how's work, my friend did this, my coworker did that, I miss chocolate(my dog), Chocolate misses you too, and then she drops the bomb on me. "Michelle gave birth yesterday!" I was so excited and happy and I start talking about being excited to see the baby and see my cousin to congratulate her. and then my mom tells me that the day that she gave birth my uncle called her asking if Michelle should take the epidural and once she mentioned epidural, I panicked. I felt as though it was the day before and my cousin was giving birth during the phone call with my mom. I began to think about all the horrible things that we read hospitals and doctors do to speed up the birthing process. I began to regret not having thought of recommending the book to my cousin so that she could be informed that the doctors are going to indirectly pressure her into doing so many things just because it would benefit them and that way on the day that she gives birth she'd be able to recognize these moments and give birth the way she wants to. I was worried and reacting to the book all over again all at the same time while I was talking to my mom. But my mom told me that the advice that she gave her was that if she couldn't handle the pain to take the epidural which is completely valid I just hoped that they didn't give her Pitocin or anything else which might've caused her to ask for an epidural. Luckily the baby came out nice and healthy and my cousin gave birth with out the epidural and she was also doing well. But boy was I scared for a second there.